A week after Hell Week

Location: INTI lvl 4 with friends
Song : Travie McCoy ft Bruno Mars - Billionaire

What was hell week? Well, it was the week I had Econs test, Public Speaking presentation, Maths tests all in the span of 3 days. I'm really glad I'm still alive and mentally healthy after that ordeal.

Right now, I'm getting myself ready for test, albeit it's an open-book test. But my gut feeling tells me whatever I bring in will be rendered useless. And I have Malaysian Studies exam tomorrow. Not as bad as last week, but still a challenge itself.

Whatever happens, Imma keep myself in top form and one day, you gonna see me be a freaking billionaire!!
Well, let's be serious here, I probably end up just being a millionaire.

=D

Louis' Farewell

I went to see off Louis Teoh, fellow INTI college mate with some of his friends. I was in the same dorm in the 1st Combined CF Camp in 2008, and the same group in the 2nd camp in 2009. He was leaving for Melbourne and is on the plane right now as I'm writing to his destination.

Another friend, Adoria is leaving soon. She was there too. I first met her during the preparation for the INTI Debate Competition last year in June. She was actually a distant cousin of my secondary school class-mate Larry!

As I look at him going through the departure gate, I wondered how would I feel when it's my turn. Yes, it's probably another year before that happens. But today was a preview of what will happen to me as well. I'll be lying if I said I'll be cool as Horatio Caine in the airport when's it's my turn, it'll probably be mixed feelings, but that's an understatement.

"What will happen to me when I set foot in US?", "Will Uni be as awesome as INTI?", "How am I gonna survive there without my parents??!!" Those run through my mind during the airport as we chit-chat in McDonalds.

Until then, I guess I'll do my best in INTI and get good results so that I can actually think of those questions instead of "Now what am I gonna do if no Universities accepts me?!".

Public Speaking Blues

Today, I had to do my presentation for public speaking class. Needless to say, it wasn't my best day in the office.

I chose "History: Why We Should Appreciate It". I felt very nervous beforehand, but that usually happens to me. My problem is, that nervous persisted throughout the whole presentation. I guess I myself wasn't that convinced by my own topic. I really did have a hard time finding a topic that I am passionate about.

In the end, I was quite monotonous, and basically didn't hit top form. Next week I have to do again, and this time, all of us are given marks. You know what...I think I'll ditch the power-point slides, and go back to the basics : My mouth and my knowledge.

Manchester United : What's Happening?

For many decades, Manchester United has always have the last say in all atrocities, be it the Munich Air Disaster, doubts over the "Fergie's Fledglings", or high-profile departures such as David Beckham or Cristiano Ronaldo.

If only the term "Glazer's Family" could be put on the first paragraph. A couple of years ago, it wouldn't be such a concern. But as the roar for a takeover goes louder and louder, the very club I support may very well be suffocated under the savage beast: Money.

It didn't help that Liverpool's (ex-)owners were kicked out emphatically because of the large amount of debts that burdened the once great club. Would the new owners, also from the US, help galvanize the club once again? We can't be sure.

But what is the problem that is Manchester United 10/11? It could not be the Glazer's entirely. Just think back a few years ago, when opposition wasn't mellow at all, we won 3 EPL titles in a row, 2 League Cups, 1 FIFA Club Championship and the holy grail, the Champions League.

Now, they can't even guarantee a win even when Man Utd is 2-0 up. The recent match is a fine example, 2 goals from Hernandez and Nani wasn't even enough to beat WBA. And the manner those 2 goals were conceded were humiliating to say the least. An own goal by Evra, and a blunder by the dinosaur Van Der Saar.

Our strikers are shooting blanks(literally), especially Rooney who is a just a speck of a shadow of the player that was EPL's player of the season a year ago. We don't have any decent midfielders. Scholes getting old, Anderson is a flop, Fletcher has probably reached his very best..and it isn't a good thing at all.

Even worse, Manchester United's greatest asset in winning titles are their defense.,nut their defense is so leaky it makes abandoned hut's roof look like it's made out of solid steel. Vidic and Ferdinand are not what they used to be anymore.

The problem lies in the fact that we lack a holding-midfield player. We used to have in the form of Hargreaves, but where is he? We need someone who's fit and consistent in term of connecting the midfield together, very much like how Xavi does it in Barcelona. If we can get someone like that, and young, the benefits far outweigh those if we buy a prolific striker, fast winder or astrong defender.

For now, I could just hope and pray that Ferguson's gamble with Bebe or the other young but not prolific players pays off. If Manchester United continues to under-perform.... then the proverb "The grass is greener on the other side" may very well be true...and that greener grass could horrifyingly be that on Stadium of Manchester.

Negaraku?

I received an email, wanna share with you all.. =)

Negara ku .....

Interesting! Really good point here, read on! A comment posted on Marina M's blog inresponse to an article on the issue. Some self-appointed defenders of Islam including the chief of "1 Malaysia " have insisted that Catholics should use "Tuhan" instead of "A" to address the Catholic or Christian God. But in the national anthem, "Tuhan" (not "A") bless the country (...Tuhan kurniakan...). How now ?!!!. If Malay-Muslims are that easily confused as portrayed by some politicians, they must be thinking that Malaysia is blessed by the Catholic/Christian God, and the Muslim God "A" is perpetually on leave. Perhaps, this confusion may cause the government to change the national anthem by replacing "Tuhan" with "A". But then again, non-muslims will not be allowed to sing the national anthem. Then it would be non-muslims turn to be confused. If this issue goes to the courts, even the judges will get kepala pening. So much for "1 Malaysia "! Happy Malaysia Day! "I think I have a suggestion.... assuming the "Tuhan" is changed to "A", for non-Muslims...we can go like this... "Rahmat Bahagia.... toooooot* Kurniakan...Raja Kita...Selamat Bertaktha". See? We censored the word. No more wording problem!

1+1=1???

I know...it sounds ridiculous right? Well...I refer that equation as "ajaran sesat" by my Calculus II lecturer.

One simple example: 1 Group of sheep, add with 1 Group of sheep. What do you get if you add them together? 1 Group of sheep. (although it's a bigger group...but it's still 1 group right?)

He then showed us this equation:

x=y

Nothing wrong right? Now we go to the next step:

x(x)=yx

x^2=xy

We multiply both side with x. This would be sensible right even if you are still PMR level..i think.

Anyway, we go to the next part, we reduce both side with y^2

x^2-y^2= xy-y^2

We still obeyed the algebraic rules, add/subtract/mutltiply/divide/play football/learn how to fly kite on BOTH SIDES.

So...we factorize!

(x-y)(x+y)=y(x-y)

Can we divide both side with a same denominator? Sure! (x-y)!! 8D Then we get...

x+y=y

That would be the end product. Now let's recap the first part (x=y)

Since x=y, then if x=1, hence, y=1. You substitute both unknows...

1+1=1

I know, it sounds unreasonable, and it actually is in some sense. He showed us the flaw with that theory if we use 0 and the application of limits and infinity. But that's the boring part...so let's just savour the screwed-up system that is Calculus II: Improper Integrals.

Sem Break is over...in a few days anyway

I'm going to start my next semester very soon. Next Monday in fact. This time, it will be the long semester until the end of November. So, I got my results for my previous semester, and my C.G.P.A. was 3.43!! Just 0.07 short of 3.5, at least I get to keep my scholarship streak going. Save some money in this dire times....

Anyway, I'll be going for a "Manikayu(Wood Badge)" camp tomorrow. It's the 2nd stage for my scout leadership course. I'm just praying the whole thing would be over and get the cert to recognize myself as a 2 bead Wood Badger. It's a state cert people!!!

My highs and lows about Fifa World Cup

Ahhh..at long last, the 2010 FIFA World Cup has ended, with the crowning of a new World Champion--- SPAIN!!! So, I enjoyed the whole 31 days of Football, but definitely, there's the shortcomings too.

HIGHS!!

1) Tsabalalalalalalalala's.... GOAL!!!


South Africa 1-0 Mexico

Simão | MySpace Video

It's the first goal of the tournament! And besides, just look at the strike. Wonderful!

2) Diego Forlan

He scored 5 five in the tournament. Practically brought Uruguay to where they are, with a helping "hand" from Suarez and all five of those goals were magical.It's a pity his last kick of the tournament, a free kick hit the bar. Otherwise, it would have brought the 3rd placing play-off to extra time.

3) La Furia Roja!! Spain the world champions!

Just look at them, they have Iker Casillas as the man between the sticks. Puyol and Sergio Ramos as defenders. A midfield spoiled with Xavi, Xabi Alonso and Iniesta, even Fabregas and David Silva are on the bench! And the strike force...David Villa!!! And Torr... let's forget about that shall we? We also cant forget the beutiful passing and ball control...a total of 3389 passes. Yeah....3389 passes. That's an average of 484 passes per game.

4) Germany's Blitzkrieg.

In just one World Cup, a total 7 matches of them. The German's destroyed their reputation of just plain technical football with the demolition of Australia,Germany and even England. They showed the way to play beautiful, solid passing football with swift counter-attack. It's akin to seeing the former Nazi armada during World War II..... but this time, the whole world applauded it.

5) Landon Donovan's goal against Algeria

Background: the US had a goal from Clint Dempsey disallowed. It's over 90 mins and 45 seconds, a few more before the whistle ends. Had USA drew, they would be eliminated at the group stage.

Result: Landon Donovan's strike sent not only the National team to the top of the group, leaving England to be trashed by Germany(thought they lost to Ghana in the end). It sent the whole US into esctasy.

6) Shakira's Waka-Waka. =D





Low's.....

1) Italy and France

Well, there isn't nice to say about them right? Italy, the defending champions were not even 5% of the might they used to be.Heck, they drew with New Zealand. All the so called Italian legendary defending were crumbled by the Sloaks(3-2) and the Kiwi's. They were probably scared when the Haka dance were performed.


2) England

I had to reserved one special place for this "team" cause they epitomized the terms of "Crash and Burn". A team, with all the abundant talent with the likes of Gerard, Lampard and Rooney can't even score against Algeria. And Algeria wasn't playing that well. It's not a need to elaborate on Robert Green's blunder, Rooney's lack of form(to say the very least) and the whole team in general. Thank God for the whipping by the Germans. They deserved it. My previous blog post on them elaborates more.

3) Luis Suarez's handball.

It's not Luis Suarez was the total villain. It'll be most footballers reaction to ensure their country won't get eliminated so easily. What happened next was out-of-this world. First, Asamoah Gyan missed his penalty kick, and Luis Suarez was celebrating like they won the World Cup. It didn't help that the players held Suarez up in the air as if he was the hero and Suarez's boasting his "Hand of God" and poor PR skills. A wonderful match nonetheless.

5) The-Goal-That-Never-Was

It's a shame that England did not get that goal, even more so for Frank Lampard, who hasn't got a goal in the WC finals to his name(and judging by his age, not anymore). But this opens up the debate about the goal-line technology. I still have a gut feeling the problem will never be resolved at all.....

Fifa World Cup 2010

England & Japan:How the three lions lost the great war from the start while the blue samurais died valiantly."

This year's World Cup is not short of controversies or excitement. But what is lacking was, in the English and Japan's point of view, the end-result to go with the hype. England, with its frantic media who is asking way too much from such an underachieving side to win the World Cup, while Japan has it's coach who claimed Japan can make it to the finals.

Well, both of them lost in the same round. England got overpowered by the German's blitzkrieg, whilst the army of the rising sun lost out on Penalty shootout because of a misdirected kick to the post.

That's where the similarities end. Let's take a look at England. They virtually had a perfect qualifying campaign and a decent run of friendly result, including a 2-1 win over, well, Japan. In fact, many people believed that the current squad, dubbed the"Golden Generation" under Fabio Capello will finally give England something to cheer and win the World Cup again. The holy grail for national teams.

The Japanese however, did not had such a bright start. Although they did qualify comfortably for the Finals, their recent friendlies results before the World Cup was bad to say the least. Even before the Finals, the national newspapers criticized the Japanese squad to be too dull in their playing styles. And laughed at the prospect of them even surviving the group stage, let alone reach the semi-finals.

But the beautiful thing about football is that what's written on paper, it's usually just a piece of trash. England suffered miserable draws, ranging from the back(think Robert Green's howler), midfield(for God sake's,playing Lampard and Gerard is like asking Alex Ferguson to play twister with Rafael Benitez) and at front( Rooney's goals, or rather the lack of it). Japan on the other hand, scored an upset over Cameroon ( this was my top surprise) and the remarkable win over Denmark. Two spectacular free kicks from Keisuke Honda & Yasuhito Endō sealed the Blue Samurai's ticket to the last 16.

And let's not even talk about England's campaign against the young German warmachine. I watched the highlights, and it was like watching the last part of Saving Private Ryan. Where the US forces(this time England) got killed off one by one by the Germans(yours truly) and the part where England was saved was when the referee blew the final whistle.

You may argue that Lampard's goal would have change the course of the game. There's no denying that Germany was shackled for a while after Matthew Upson's goal, but the problem is the pkayers themselves.It's not like if Lampard's disallowed goal was the end of the world, heck they have 55 minutes to scored THAT goal. And at the very least, don't concede another. The 3 lions(oh wait, cubs) horribly failed in both task.

(England-1, Germany-2, Fifa-a big zero)

Japan faced a resillent Paraguay team. Although it was a dull game, not just because of the scoreline. Japan did play some pretty good passes which Capello would do anything for England to emulate. The thing is, if Japan had gone guns-blazing from the start, they would probably have won. Throughout the World Cup finals, Japan had been playing cautions football, it's a pain to see how they could have gone so close in making chances and finishing good ones if they just take the risk at the appropriate moment. If only Keisuke Honda had a decent striker to work with.

Too bad the coach played safe in this poker game and lost by just a number, or rather a penalty kick from the defender Yuichi Komano, who had worked very hard alongside the other Japanese players.

But what we all know is that Japan will go back to their motherland as national heroes. Fallen, but with "valiant" added to it. England......... it's safe to say that England can never win the World Cup, because they are England. Are they are about to see red over their woeful performances, and I'm not even talking about a battalion of fans wearing the away kit armed with tomatoes.
(Cue: Tomato blast!)

*Oh yeah, Holland defeated Brazil 2-1

Debate

I wasn't officially in any clubs in INTI recently, so when I heard that there was a debate competition for all the INTI colleges, I signed up immediately.

I was delighted to know that the pioneers for this year's group were Adoria(Wei Lun's cousin) and Nicholas(whom I debated against last year). It's kinda like a reunion... haha...

Apparently, we do not have the motion until...20 minutes before the competitin(WTH!) and our only clue is a theme "Equity,Access and Quality"

(What I got for google image search for that term, Ironically, I still don't have what the right picture said)

I'm kinda glad that the people making up the teams are experienced speakers from various schools in Penang. So it's like an All-Star team!! It also shows I still have alot to catch up and I have better speakers than I who I can improve my own skills.

Hopefully we can do well in the debate competition, and make the college proud!

And so, my college life begins..

If you all didn't know by now, I have already enrolled in INTI Penang's American Degree Transfer Program(May Intake). The reason for being relatively late in enrollment was because I need time to decide whether I should go College and Form 6. Now many of you will surely pick college cause you don't need to wear school uniform and all those stuff but.... for me, Form 6 is also a strong option for me too.

Anyway, I choose INTI in the end. My intake for my program has only 12 students!! So, I thank God for this small amount as it helps me to mix with my new college mates easier. Not only that, the May Intake begins with a short semester, hence, I only take 2 subjects for this 7-week long program. So, it is definitely easier for me to juggle between my work, study and getting to be more used to my new surroundings.

So, I did meet some new friends like Kent, Nick,Manesh and Chen Yu(who was in Hamid Khan for a brief time). Didn't get to know the girls that well yet cause there's only 3 of them!! XD

The 12 of us are in the same class for English, but the majority of us split up between Maths and Econs. Mine was Maths.

For the Maths class, we combined with the March intake student, so the class students would be aroud 20++. I'm also in the same class with Tabitha, whom I met during the AFS interview. We don't really talk much cause the College Maths is quite a touch subject. And I have to score well in this paper so I can have a easier live in college.

So, I'm proud to say I survived a week in college!!! XD

Irony

Well, I let Cracked.com do the explaining on my blog, ironically. XD

Only a select few people in the world get irony. The rest think they do. And that's ironic. Possibly.

Just The Facts

1. Most people simply do not get irony.
2. After reading this topic, most people will still not get irony
3. But they'll think they will even more than before.
4. Then they'll go out into the internet and disseminate even more false information about irony.
5. We don't even know why we're doing this; we just get a kick out of it.

Cracked on Irony

Irony is the clash of opposites. It is the juxtaposition of what is expected against what happens; what you know and what you think you know.

It is not the same as coincidence. If a ginger person finds that the only drinks left at a party are cans of ginger beer and ginger ale, this is not ironic. If anything, this is the opposite of irony. If there is a convention of ginger hair haters and the only drink available is ginger beer or ginger ale, this may be considered ironic, but it's a long shot.

Nor is it bad luck. If a president is killed by someone accidently discharging their weapon, this is bad luck. If they are killed by someone discharging their weapon in celebration of that president being elected, that is ironic.

If something is appropriate, it is not ironic. If you see a grossly obese person tucking into a kebab, this is not ironic. It is exactly what you expect them to be doing. If you see a fat person deciding to give their heart a break for once and instead of going to KFC, they cross the road to get to the salad bar and are then run down by a truck transporting diet pills which, this is ironic.

If in doubt, just don't use it. It's better to stay quiet, because you're bound to get it wrong. And then your effort to look intelligent will only end up making you look like a bona fide simpleton. Aah, the irony.

Here, irony is perfectly summed up in the simple phrase "I'm not."

The Internet Is Wrong

The following are cases of the internet lying to you. None of these examples demonstrate irony, only that somebody is capable of being an idiot long enough to caption a poster.

Blogs

Is there any of my friend's blog which is still alive??!!

3 weird dreams,in one night.

Honestly, I didn't know how I end up in the first dream, let alone 3 of them. It's usual for us to dream about starting without realizing the starting point, or that we're dreaming in the first place.
Anyway, I'll start off from where I'd remembered. Dreams are in bold, my comments between each dreams are in italic.

-----------------------------------------Dream 1---------------------------------------------

So I was walking through some big house, but it kinda looks like my grandma's house in Ipoh..somewhat. In my mind, I was quite angry and wanted to find this girl. It was time I tell her a piece of my mind, face to face. So, I went through this complex, and I finally met her. But with a window blocking me.

I then knock the window just to get her attention. She was talking with some of her friends. When she saw me, I told her to come in cause "we need to talk". But she told me to come out, in a somewhat happy mood.

At that moment, I was really pissed off. And then I shouted at her(but the curious thing is, I didn't hear my voice,though it "looked" like I was shouting hard) telling her that I have been chasing her for so long, it's time she comes to me.

Then she had a teary face, and she walked with her friends out from the scene. I then came out, and find her. But I couldn't find her anymore. So I quickly searched through the place and the yard. After that, I heard sound of a procession, I thought it was a wedding. I found the bride..i thought it could be her...but it wasn't. Then procession left....and I'm left stading, baffled by what happened.

Moments after, the scene changed. It was something that looked like my church...i think. So I walked around, then I saw in one of the rooms, some youth activities inside. I glanced through, didn't see her.... then I walked through a door, the scene changes again. There, in a cafe, was my mum. She then told me "Why worry? Isn't she coming to visit the church this Sunday?

I was puzzled, but I walked out. As I searching, I tried calling her through the phone, but to no avail. Then a call came to me, I thought it was her! But it was my friend, telling me to bring a game because he and his friend wants to play. I just said yes then continue searching, I end up in a familiar street in the middle of the night. Then I woke up.

____________________________________________________________________

When I woke up, I realized that it was just a dream...or a nightmare? I don't know. But either way, it still sucks that we can be together for anytime soon. I looked at the clock, it was 7.15 am. I was supposed to be going to tennis at 8..but...what the hell..i still wanna sleep. So...I sleep!

)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))Dream 2((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

This was quite a short dream, but equally baffling to. My parents and I were watching a play in my church.Forgot what the play was all about, but all I remembered was that after the play, my dad and one of the actors were arguing about something. Apparently about that actors inability to protray an accountant. lol.... it got heated and we all just get my dad away into the car and drove home.

In a car, I told my dad that "if we want to mock someone, mock them until they can't defend themselves, just so to save our faces." Then he wanted to reply back but my mum stopped us. So...it was raining...then there was a motorcyclist who fel from his bike, and rolled over to the other side. We somehow moved over the motorcycle without damaging it...then the dream ended.

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

It was 9 a.m.,but the clear skies couldn't help me comprehend what in the world just happened in the first..and second dream. I'm still going blur about those dreams, but this time, I took a gamble and sleep again, just to see what's in store for me.


+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++Dream 3(finally!!)++++++++++++++++++++++++++

This would be the most baffling of them all. I remembered walking through this elavated walkway, covered in wood planks. With windows along the side.Very much like those you see in western rainforest canopy walkway. As I look out, I saw some kind of church with resort facilities. The whole surrounding matches those with cool-climate places like Cameron Highlands or Fraser Hills.

Then.... I ended up in front of this chapel. I saw my friends near there, then one of them just jokingly told me that I'm still in my pyjamas.

The worst part was...I was in my pyjamas...WHAT???? How the heck my clothes changed to pyjamas?? I dashed back, went into my parents room to change and then went into my room.

What I saw, was like an altar room...with Muslim and Buddhist altars in it. It was really dark and reddish..very scary. I quickly put out the candles in both altar, and the room became light again. Then there was this house keeper(i think) who came in, and told him to put a plant in a lotus-esque pond. Apparently, this symbolizes that I have shunned away from all this religion and are not scared of them. This is also shows I'm a Christian. At that time, it was like something we Christians do.

Then he showed me what "evil" those people do. When I looked out, I saw some ppl in speed boats speeding through the water, and when they stopped at their own places, they just take the water and splash around.

When I turned back, my whole room became like a cafeteria, with many people in it chatting away. I felt that I wanted to pee and went into this room which was supposedly the washroom.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Lucikly, I didn't pee on the bed after that dream. But...when I looked back at that dream..i wondered...why in the world I put a plant in that pond? It sounded and look bizarre to say the least.It was already 11.15am, I think I had enough weird dreams for the day.

Anyone mind helping me in interpreting the dreams? I'm at a lost here.....

4th May...my birthday!

Yes peeps, yesterday was my milestone 18th birthday!!! Really had a great time.

Anyway, few days before this, there were already people wishing my happy birthday. My facebook wall gradually become more interesting during the day when alot of my friends wished me on the Facebook wall! At one point, I got 66 notifications after I offline for just 5 hours!

For me, I took my time to say a thank you to all of them, cause I too wish that when I wish someone happy birthday, I get a reply back. It's basically how I show my appreciation to my friends who wished me. =)

Yeah, it was definitely tiring...I probably got about 100+ wished(including verbally and in my phone). So imagine my face when I saw those scribbles on my Facebook wall. Was shocked and happy at the same time because, despite having to reply 2 each and one of them, I thank God for this because it shows I have many friends.

So, I start off my with working, but for today, just a five hour shift. And then I went to get my cake which still hasn't been eaten yet. XD I will upload the photo later on...

Then, I visited my friend's college cell. Finally, I manage to make it for the CG, and I also want to go because she is leaving for Matrics on May 10...so...I try to take any opportunity to meet her again.I also brought LF also, guessing this would a great chance for him to hear more about God.

But the amazing thing was, not only God let me bring one person only, LF also brought AH and Ryu along! Amazing how God works when we have faith for such little stuffs; God will give you more than you can imagine,

okay.... it's alright...

I mean, it's a good chance to make up and reconcile right?


DAMN YOU...she really changed alot. And not for the better.If last time was because of Shyness, I can guarantee now is because of lansi or arrogance.

And worse part is, is only to me.

Haiz....this is definitely not a nice part on my day, but I still did have fun over there! Especially the discussion.

After that, I went to Seo's house to meet up with my friends from Brotherhood for a while. We played games and I tried my hand on Winning Eleven 2010. I beat Biboo Rabbit 4-1 XD

I was Barcelona, leading 2-0 on the start of 2nd half. =D

Yeah, so that's my gist of 4th May 2010. Sure there was that not-so joyful part. But it's part and parcel of live. I just go on and enjoy life, whacking some hard tackles along the way. Verbally and physically. =)


I think that'll be my life motto!

Dancing when the stars go blue....

I dance today... and look around to see those who are dancing with me.

But when someone does not join me on the dance floor of life,

I realise there is nothing wrong with me. It just means they either do

not feel like dancing or they prefer a different step.



SO you are dancing....you are dancing...you are dancing as free as a bird... joyfully and harmoniously and with such loving energy...



And yet you wonder why someone will not dance with you.



Your focus is so much on the person who will not dance with you,

that you are not aware just how many people are dancing so close to you...joining

you on the dance floor.



But when someone does not dance with you, it does not mean your dance is lousy.

It does not mean you cannot dance!! Oh no!


It does not mean you are doing the wrong dance or you are out of tune or out of step.


It just means that someone else either doesn't feel like dancing right now... or they

would prefer a different dance... a different floor.



Our dance is our life... our being.



And when someone walks out on us, leaves our life in some way, decides

not to sign up for the next dance class or doesn't wish to be our dance partner, it

does not mean there is anything wrong with us.



We might think there is a lot wrong with us



We might think we are ugly



We might think we stepped on someone's toes.



We might think we have gone on a bit too long.



We might think we have overstepped the mark... hugged too hard? Held someone too

long?



But all of us have to get it in our heads that there is nothing wrong with us.



We have to quit taking things personally. Just have to if we are to live our life in the

way we would like to live our life. Quit taking things personally.



Because when people decide not to be our dance partners, to refuse our invitation to

join us in whatever way we would like them to join us, it is about them and not about

us.



How can it ever be about us?



We cannot convert people into liking us... we cannot convert people into wanting to

be with us every moment of the dayor night or even some of the day or night... we

cannot convert people into falling in love with us.


We just cannot.


We might miss them like crazy... but we still do not have the power to convert them

into being our buddies, lovers or companions.



If they do join us, it is because they have made that choice to do so.



If we fill our hearts with love and express that love we will become very attractive...

very attractive indeed.



But not always to the person whom we expect will respond to our attractiveness.



Because the truth is that some people won't appreciate our light.



Some people just won't appreciate our loving, as strange as that might seem to us.



Some people just won't respond to our warm smiles or melt into our arms with a hug.



Some people will walk away from us.. keep their distance... leave our space.



And because they decide that they are uncomfortable with us, or they would rather be

in another space, does not take anything away from us, does not make us wrong,

does not make us lacking or inadequate or plain bad.



It just means there is something happening with them because they cannot feel

comfortable with what is right about us.



They might be vibrating at a different energy level. They might find our loving

smothering, disabilitating as they play their role of victim or wish to separate

themselves from the world.



They might just need a different lesson to learn and we cannot be their teacher in this

time and space.



But as Mother Teresa says: Love them anyway.



If they are meant to be our students or our teachers some time soon, they will show

up again... they always do.



If they are not meant to show up in our life then they will journey to pastures new...

but at a soul level the connection goes on. People leave this planet but the soul

connection always remains. We are all one.



So look around and be grateful for your dance partners.. those who are dancing with

you right now.



And realise that all those who have ever danced with you have shown you something

about yourself.. and no one ever leaves you.



And if you give love to someone... pure unconditional love.. they stay in your heart

forever and you stay in the hearts of those who give the same to you.



Just carry on dancing.



You will never be alone



The dance of the heart is the richest one... where the love flows in each and every

moment.



Let's dance... and dance... and dance... and dance...and let's see our

connection…..

*************************************************************************************
I love the anology behind this email I received. We all can relate ourselves to this dance session....probably at varying degrees, but, the dance floor is ours to treasure. =)

Work and Play: Between Responsibilities and Leisure

Last saturday, I had a scholarship exam to study in Wolverhampton Royal school. It was held in KL. I choosed the "Humanities" paper and in simple terms, it was quite a joyride, haha. It wasn't that boring, but wasn't really that hard till it's beyond comprehending the paper. Then on Sunday, I have an outing to play futsal. (This is be important later on)

In the paper, we have English (Grammer), Maths and 3 writing tasks. The last one was about people who work very hard but gave no time for leisure; and those who only know how to play and be merry. I was required to give my opinions about both these stereotypes and my own opinion regarding work and responsibilities.

So, in my point of view( and many of you, I hope) is that, well, there is time for us to play and have fun, but we do have to work very hard because not only our responsibilities comes first, but also that we can have a good life and not worry when play or enjoying ourselves.

But, in a cruel twist of fate, after the exam, I received a message about a scout leadership course on Sunday, which if you noticed earlier, I had a futsal game. And the course is a full-day course. It wouldn't be that bad if it wasn't for the fact I gave my views on work and play.

It took me quite some time to decide, but I decided that I would go for the course. Some of the reasons were:

1) I get to be a "penolong pemimpin"(assistant scout master) for my scout troop and get 2 "manikayu". It would be a equivalent of an administrative post which is state recognized and a medal in miltary terms respectively.

(It may not look like much, but I'll take it over Paris Hilton)

2) The another reason is that well, futsal can wait for another day. It's not like the end of the whole if I skip one right? And also the scout course comes only once a year

3) I'll need to spend more money for the futsal and drinks then listening to the "big fish" people giving theory courses as if they are talking to themselves.


At the end of the day, we have to take compromises whenever we make a decision. The deciding factor however, which choice would have a lesser negative impact on our lives.

If you did dropped by,

What's with me?

Up until today, I still have a part of me who can't let you go.

Right now, I just can't imagine me being with another girl whatsoever.

The scar you inflicted on me, whether intentional or not, it's still there.

I can bet the whole world you don't know how I was hurt that time.

I can hid the pain, seal it off with all the fun and joy I had all this while, but nevertheless,

The scar is still there.

I just talked to you just now, but you still don't seem to care.

It's like I'm talking to another person, a very different one from the one I used to know.

It's either an "oh", "lidat lor", "hmmm" or better still, nothing.

I can still talk to you, and trying slowly to stop talking to you so you won't notice,

But it's hard for me to ignore you,cause I can't imagine what would happen if you suddenly realized,

I'm ignoring you like how you did it to me.

Now though, you are in College and all the perks that go with it.

I'm sure you won't bother about me not talking to you.

Of course! All the boys in your college, I'm sure they are better smooth-talkers to me,

and it seems it is working, judging by your Facebook wall.

Those words you chatted, it was my line, my conversation.

But then again, you never give a damn.

Incident in UK supermarket‏

I got this from an email. I find the analogy very interesting and yet, thought-provoking.

I am passing this on for your information
An incident occurred in a UK supermarket recently, when the following discussion was witnessed:

A Muslim woman dressed in a Burkha (A black gown & face mask) was standing with her shopping in a queue at the checkout.
When it was her turn to be served, and as she reached the cashier, she made a loud remark about the English Flag lapel pin, which the female attending the checkout was wearing on her blouse.

The cashier reached up and touched the pin and said, 'Yes, I always wear it proudly. My son serves abroad with the army and I wear it for him'.

The Muslim woman then asked the cashier when the UK was going to stop bombing and killing her countrymen, explaining that she was Iraqi.

At that point, a Gentleman standing in the queue stepped forward, and interrupted with a calm and gentle voice, and said to the Iraqi woman:

'Excuse me lady, but hundreds of thousands of men and women, just like this lady's son have fought and sacrificed their lives so that people just like YOU can stand here, in England, which is MY country and allow you to blatantly accuse an innocent check-out person of bombing YOUR countrymen'.

'It is my belief that if you were allowed to be as outspoken as this when in Iraq, which you claim to be YOUR country, then we wouldn't need to be fighting there today '.

'However - now that you have learned how to speak out and criticize us English people who have given you the protection of our country,
I will gladly pay the cost of a ticket to get you back to Iraq.'
'When you get there, and if you manage to survive for being as outspoken as what you are here in England, then you should be able to help straighten out the mess which your countrymen have got you into in the first place, which appears to be the reason that you have come to MY country to escape from.'

All listening cheered and applauded.


In a way, it is true. The intention of the so-called "War on terror" is good, and there are many reasons why the US and the UK government would send in troops to invade Iraq. The only problem I think most people would have is how the war is managed. Whether or not the benefits of the war would be worth all the pain the soldiers have to endure and the taxpayers' pockets have to endure, I'm not so sure.

MYF Youth Retreat. is.......just read the post.

I was in the bus near Bukit Merah and I thought to myself: "What in God's name am I participating in some "youth retreat" camp costing as much as Tiger Wood's dignity organized by some church I rarely go to? What's worse, I barely know anyone there??!!"

Oh yeah, I and my BK classmates promised Joanne we will join the camp last year so....yeah, I DID forget why I went there in the first place. More so, I and Jo Lene were the only ones who followed Joanne there. Jonathan was working in Breeks, and Nathaniel is in Subang, or is it Petaling Jaya? Either way, all places in Selangor look and smell the same. =.=

Anyway, I was acquainted with Denise so it wasn't really that bad, and also Anne, who was a friend of Sook Koon. In the bus, I only talked with Jo Lene because I wasn't really acquainted with the others.

But after 4 days in Cheefoo ( The venue), things changed. Alot. There weren't many people who joined this retreat(think 19++) and it was very easy for us to communicate. They started talking to me, I started talking to them, somehow the barriers were broken.

Dr. Sam's sharing of the word was also something to look upon. He really brings a new dimension when it comes to sharing, he taught us songs before he starts preaching without fail, from the very hilarious (Ping Pong song XD) to the melodious (Dona Nobis Pacem) and many more.It does make you wonder, how shallow are the lyrcis in today's Christian Music compared to those found in Hymns, many which we the younger ones will never learn to embrace.

Aunt Valarie and Uncle Geam Liang was also very fun to talk with and share things with. They really know how to relate with Teenagers, and come out with some witty one-liners as well. I really can't imagine the Trinity Youth without them...haha...

I also like the whole program, which ironically doesn't really have much in it.XD Why? Well, this is the camp where we are not burdened with intense programs and scheduling,there's no need to start exactly by time or end by a certain time(though we usually abide by the rules when it comes to sleeping) and most of all, we have freetime!! Lot's of them. And to me, this epitomizes what a retreat is all about, we have the luxury to TRY* to learn how to maneuver a Rip-stick, play basketball, try out the cool playground(not the McD ones, thankfully) We even get to do Star-Gazing for one night and two comets pass us by!!

I can even play Football!! And better still, not by myself! Apparently there is also FGS Subang Jaya who were also sharing the place and well, someof the MYF-ers were quite intimidated by the sheer number of ppl (Me and Jo Lene, we're used to it =.=||) but once we get 2 know them, they are a bunch of friendly people. I even get to score a goal....since October. XDDDD

Of course, I didn't just sign up for this camp just for the fun of it(I did have lots of it), or to see pretty girls(Not alot, but still 'ada' XD) but more so to learn about God, without distractions from computers or people I know. Throughout the course, we are told that we are never to young to be a disciple, I couldn't agree more, cause even if you don't want to be want, God will put you in situations where you can't help but share a little bit of the Gospel or Christianity(It does happen, trust me.) There's is no way you can outsmart God.

But, God has a tender side to him too. One of my most significant event during the whole camp was when I prayed my whole heart out to God about every,everything. But as I was praying, suddenly I just can't speak, I have no idea what happened. I tried to utter a word, but I just can't move my lips, that's when God told me to not worry so much. I can feel that he was trying to calm me down and just showed me that he is my shepherd and that he cares for me. I was really comforted from that moment.

I have no regreats joining this camp, it's the camp where eveybody talks with everyone, and it's a rare sight for many camps I been too..... new friendships are forged, and somehow, I believe they will last than some I foolishly keep.

Right now, the guys are now spamming a photo on facebook. Right now there's about 117 comments, still a long way to beat my primary school photo(443+), ironically, I chose the Youth Retreat than the hotel-stay with my primary school. THANK GOD!!